Life: It Goes On - January 19

Happy Sunday! It's sunny here...at least for now...but only a whopping 3 degrees so we're hunkering down. Sitting here next to the windows on the north side of the house, it's considerably cooler than where I've been sitting, enjoying my morning coffee and watching CBS Sunday Morning. May have to grab a cardigan and some slippers if I'm going to sit here long enough to finish this and write up a couple of reviews. How many more days until summer? 

Last Week I: 

Listened To: Hidden Valley Road by Robert Kolker. I don't have any audiobooks that have become available just now, and I'm way behind on podcasts, so I'll probably listen to some of those until a book becomes available. 

Watched: Football, college basketball, women's professional volleyball. Did I tell you that Omaha is home to two professional women's teams? Last week we watched one team and this week we watched the other. Pretty excited that ESPN feels like there's a decent enough audience that they will be showing at least some of the matches for that team. It also has Nebraska alum on it, included two that are Olympians. 

Read: Pineapple Street by Jenny Jackson for book club this week. 

Made: What did we eat this week? I'd like to tell you but I honestly can't remember anything other than homemade mac and cheese. I cannot get myself in the mood to cook lately. 

Enjoyed: Wednesday was hair night and you know I always love that. Friday we had dinner with friends and I always enjoy that. But what I most enjoyed was texts and FaceTime calls I was getting from Miss H, who is on a trip to Phoenix this week. Life was really hard for her for a really long time and it makes this mama's heart so happy to see her loving life and having great adventures. 

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This Week I’m:  

Planning: This past week, as part of the Cozy Minimalist Community's House Hushing Challenge, I started "hushing" my house. In hushing you clear the surfaces in a room (at least) and live with it emptied for at least 24 hours then make the decision on what to bring back. Tuesday the next room will be announced and I'm eager to start that, after seeing this past week's results. 

Thinking About: Less than two months until Daylight Savings Time begins and I can't wait for sun in the evenings. I mean, it's dark in the morning here until about the time I'm half way to work everyday - I don't care if it's light then since I can't see outside during the day anyway. 

Feeling: Lighter. This week I "hushed" my kitchen. Which is to say that I took everything off of the counters and refrigerator and lived with it like that for 24 hours before deciding what needed to come back in. I found new homes for several things (my big mixer will now live in the basement since I only use it a few times a year and I am loving the the result. Now to work on the tops of the cupboards!

Looking forward to: Book club this week. 

Question of the week: January tends to be the time that people either decide to start living healthier or to declutter and reorganize (or both). Are you one of those people, if so, which do you do? I have given up on using January as the time to start a regime for lifestyle (the gym is too full, there's often too much decadent food left over from the holidays, it's too cold to walk outside). But you know I'm all about any kickstart I can get to declutter and organize! 

Life: It Goes On - September 1

Happy Sunday! It's cliche and perhaps a little Boomer-y to ask, but I'll ask it nonetheless - how is it September already?! 

On social media, the "influencers" have long ago begun decorating for fall; but, for me, fall doesn't begin until at least today. Even then, I'm not yet particularly happy about it - just means that my plants are going to be dying, it will be darker sooner in the evenings, and I'm going to have to start wearing a jacket. 

One day, before long, I'll wake up and think "I really want to throw on one of my new sweaters" or "what a beautiful evening to have a fire in the fire pit." Then I'll know that I'm ready for autumn. And I'll try to live in the moment, not worrying about the imminent arrival of winter; and focus on the good parts of autumn, and not the fact that my gardens will soon be nothing more than dirt. Maybe this year I'll bring back Fall Feasting - a couple of months of reading food-centric books.

Last Week I: 

Listened To:  Finished Elin Hilderbrand's The Five-Star Weekend (which I thought was her latest and last but isn't) and started Hernan Diaz's Trust. 

Watched: Three more episodes of Emily In Paris - I know I said I was pissed at it and might not watch any more, but I did and now I'm even more annoyed. I may or may not watch the final episode of the season. BUT the exciting news is that college volleyball and football are back and hopes are high! 

Read: Kate Atkinson's Death At The Sign Of The Rook. Today I'm starting Rainbow Rowell's latest, Slow Dance. 

Made: If you can use tomatoes in it, we've made it this week: wedge salads, BLT sandwiches, pasta with tomato and basil, pico de gallo.

Enjoyed: We went with friends Friday evening to see a one-man play, Democracy Su*ks - *unless we can fix it. Tiny theater (might seat 60) - I can't imagine acting that close to your audience and having no one else to lean on. Funny show, with some riffs on Broadway songs, some raunchiness, and a lot of heart. Dinner and drinks afterward, where we solved all of the world's problems. 

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This Week I’m:  

Planning: I meant to get back to Mini-him's dresser yesterday; but I'm so fired up to declutter that I spent most of the yesterday doing that and I'm fired up to keep at it. Hoping to get another load of stuff out of the house yet this weekend. THEN maybe I'll get back to that dresser. 

Thinking About: I have a big crowd coming for Thanksgiving and I'm already thinking about what all will need to be done before then. I'm trying to think of ways to make life less stressful. I'm pondering hiring a cleaning service for the first time. Do you use a cleaning service? If so, how do you like it?

Feeling: Torn. I have a set of dishes ready to donate. I only use it once a year and have plenty of other options. But it was my mom's. It's the sentimental things that I have a hard time letting go of. I'd ask the Big Guy if I should keep them, but I know he'll say yes (he says that about everything). Clearly what I'm looking for is someone to tell me it's ok to let them go. 

Looking forward to: Not having to go to work tomorrow. And maybe starting to take more time off work. 

Question of the week: Are you a minimalist, a maximalist or somewhere in-between? 

***This week's review theme will be "just for fun" (also, how did I not get any reviews posted last week?).***

Decluttering At The Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle With Stuff by Dana K. White

Decluttering At The Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle With Stuff by Dana K. White

240 pages

Published February 2018 by Nelson, Thomas Inc. 

Publisher's Summary:

While the world seems to be in love with the idea of tiny houses and minimalism, many of us simply can't purge it all and start from nothing. Yet a home with too much stuff is difficult to maintain, so where do we begin? Add in paralyzing emotional attachments and constant life challenges, and it can feel almost impossible to make real decluttering progress.

In Decluttering at the Speed of Life, decluttering expert and author Dana White identifies the mindsets and emotional challenges that make it difficult to declutter. In her signature humorous approach, she provides workable solutions to break through these struggles and get clutter out—for good!

Not only does Dana provide strategies, but she dives deep into how to implement them, no matter the reader's clutter level or emotional resistance to decluttering. She helps identify procrasticlutter—the stuff that will get done eventually so it doesn't seem urgent—as well as how to make progress when there's no time to declutter.

In Decluttering at the Speed of Life, Dana’s chapters cover:

• Why You Need This Book (You Know Why)
• Your Unique Home
• Decluttering in the Midst of Real Life
• Change Your Mind, Change Your Home
• Breaking Through Your Decluttering Delusions
• Working It Out Room by Room
• Helping Others Declutter

As long as we're living and breathing, new clutter will appear. The good news is that by following Dana’s advice, decluttering will get easier, become more natural, and require significantly fewer hours, less emotional bandwidth, and little to no sweat to keep going.

My Thoughts: 

You may well be wondering why someone who has read so many books about decluttering, done 40 Bags In 40 Days so many times, and who follows multiple organizing/simplifying accounts on social media would need to read yet another book about decluttering. Fair enough. Even I wondered why I was checking out another book about decluttering. But Myquillen Smith, the Cozy Minimalist, recommended it and she recommended this one as one of her favorites. So here we are. 

And guess what? 

I learned a different way to view and attack decluttering. Some of what White says goes entirely against what I've learned before but I can certainly see the logic of it, especially for those who are new to decluttering. 

White speaks from experience; while she may not have met the dictionary definition of "hoarder," she started married life in a house that already had too much in it when two complete households merged with no reduction in "stuff." White is a person that can't pass up a good bargain and held on to things because they "might" be useful in the future. Then kids came along, items were inherited, hobbies came and went. She knows how hard it is to start the process and how much it takes to change a mindset. 

Thus was born a desire to reset her life and along the way she has developed a system that worked for her and has now worked for thousands of others. White hosts a podcast, writes a blog, and is the author of three books. She's speaks from her own experience and those of people who have reached out to her. 

Here's what differed in her approach from other approaches I've learned about: 

• She advocates using the Visibility Rule: start with the most visible spaces first. White advises this will ensure the results of efforts will be visible which will inspire readers to keep going and increase decluttering energy. 
• She does not advocate emptying a space, because you might lose steam part way through the process and end up with a bigger mess than you started with or become so overwhelmed that you just stop. 
• She does not, in this book at least, correlate decluttering with organizing. White wants it to be clear that you cannot even think about organizing until after you have completely decluttered and maybe not even then. Perhaps just keeping things decluttered will be enough, using her steps, to keep things relatively organized. 

In every space White recommends readers follow five steps: 

• Step 1: Trash - this one is self-explanatory and the easiest of the steps. Start with the most visible mess and do as much as you can in the time you have. 
• Step 2: Do The Easy Stuff - "Easy stuff is the stuff that has an established home somewhere else." What's different for me in this step is that White advocates taking each thing you find that's out of place to the correct place immediately; she suggests that putting in a box to handle later causes a potential new problem. 
• Step 3: Duh Clutter - these are things that you immediately can see need to be donated. 
• Step 4: Ask the Two Decluttering Questions - 
• #1 - If I needed this item, where would I look for it first? Take it there immediately. 
• #2 - If I needed this item, would it ever occur to me that I already had one? This might be something you use so rarely that you forget you own it and buy another without thinking to look for it. 
• Step 5: Make It Fit - like other decluttering experts, White urges readers to think of their spaces as containers. Your home is a container; each room, each closet, each cupboard, each drawer is a container. First consolidate the things you've been left with after the first four steps and then purge down to the limits of the container. 

White takes readers through each of these steps, room by room, including hobby rooms and storage spaces. She talks about having to declutter dreams (the hobby you'd been so excited to start, the baby clothes when it becomes clear there will be no more children). There is a section on helping others, including friends, children, and spouses (sadly, there was no magic trick to get your spouse on board) and another section on decluttering when you have to do it all (moving, elderly parents). Finally, she talks about how decluttering has to become a lifestyle, that it is something that you will always need to keep doing. Which is just what I needed to hear - I so often feel that I am failing when I am once again decluttering areas that I have decluttered again and again. Some of the advice here is old news to me and some of the steps won't be necessary for me in most spaces. But I'm definitely going to try using this system in some areas that have confounded me over the years. Wish me luck! 

Life: It Goes On - August 11

Happy Sunday! What a beautiful weekend we've had here - sunny with unseasonably cool temperatures. We spent the weekend evenings on decks/patios and blankets and jackets were required. Don't get me wrong - that doesn't mean I'm looking forward to autumn! In fact, I'm heading out today to buy more plants for my pots out back because I'm planning on being out there for another couple of months. 

Last Week I: 

Listened To: I'm Glad My Mom Died by Jennette McCurdy and I'm about half way through The Villa by Rachel Hawkins.

Watched: Not much besides the Olympics and some news coverage. 

Read: I finished Liane Moriarty's Here One Moment and started Decluttering at the Speed of Life: Winning Your Never-Ending Battle with Stuff by Dana K. White. I've also started Kate Atkinson's Death At The Sign Of The Rook and Lisa Wingate's Shelterwood. It's a good thing the Olympics are done today - I need to get back to spending more time reading and less time in front of the television! 

Made: Lots of quick and easy pasta meals this week - spaghetti with meat sauce and something I'm calling Italian goulash. I roasted a lot of tomatoes for future use, as well. 

Enjoyed: My brother and sister-in-law came back through on their way home Wednesday so we got to spend time with them again, we had a lovely evening with friends on their deck Friday evening, and we got to spend some time yesterday with Mini-him and Miss C. Best part of that last one? They hauled out two more loads of their stuff. I may soon be able to move in my basement again! 

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This Week I’m:  

Planning: You know me - whenever I'm reading something about decluttering, I'm planning my next decluttering project in my house. The book I'm reading now (and Go Simplified) really stresses thinking of your bookcases as containers and you can't have more books that there is realistically enough room for in your container - our shelves are bulging at the seams and it's time to make some tough decisions. 

Thinking About: School started for our school district last week - a full week earlier than my kids started when they were growing up. With so many kids involved in organized activities for the first six weeks of summer, it doesn't leave much time for kids to just relax and be kids. Also, it seriously impinges on the number of weeks I get a significantly easier commute! 

Feeling: Lazy. To be fair, I got thrown off my game yesterday when Mini-him decided they'd be coming to get their stuff and I had to help with that (and to encourage them to shop my basement to get even more things out of it!

Looking forward to: An upcoming visit to Miss C's parents' home. We really enjoy them. 

Question of the week: We did a back-to-school supply drive at work and I was astonished by the things the kids need these days. So many things I wish the schools were able to supply but clearly can't afford to provide. Do you still have kids in school? If so, what's the thing that those of us who don't would find the most surprising? 

**This weeks review have this in common - they are both books I was offered through Netgalley.**

Keep The Memories, Lose the Stuff: Declutter, Downsize, and Move Forward with Your Life by Matt Paxton

Keep The Memories, Lose the Stuff: Declutter, Downsize, and Move Forward with Your Life by Matt Paxton

320 page

Published February 2022 by Penguin Publishing Group

Publisher's Summary: 

Your boxes of photos, family’s china, and even the kids' height charts aren’t just stuff; they’re attached to a lifetime of memories—and letting them go can be scary. With empathy, expertise, and humor, Keep the Memories, Lose the Stuff, written in collaboration with AARP, helps you sift through years of clutter, let go of what no longer serves you, and identify the items worth keeping so that you can focus on living in the present.

 
For over 20 years, Matt Paxton has helped people from all walks of life who want to live more simply declutter and downsize. As a featured cleaner on Hoarders and host of the Emmy-nominated Legacy List with Matt Paxton on PBS, he has identified the psychological roadblocks that most organizational experts routinely miss but that prevent so many of us from lightening our material load. Using poignant stories from the thousands of individuals and families he has worked with, Paxton brings his signature insight to a necessary task. 
 
Whether you’re tired of living with clutter, making space for a loved one, or moving to a smaller home or retirement community, this book is for you. Paxton’s unique, step-by-step process gives you the tools you need to get the job done.

My Thoughts: 

You all know how I'm all about trying to find ways to declutter and organize my home so you'll also know that I'm always on the look out for books that will help me in that process. When Myquillyn Smith (The Nester) recommended this book, I immediately requested it from the library. 

Can I just tell you how much I wish I had read this book when it first came out? It would have made such a difference when it came time, in the summer of 2022, to begin clearing out my parents' home of 50+ years in preparation for my dad's move. In fact the big take away from this book is in the title - the things you have are not what's important, it's the memories those things stir that are what matters. 

I wish we would have spent more time asking my dad about the memories different things brought up and I wish I would have known about the Legacy List at that time. There's a lot of great information in this book for people who are looking to downsize or people who, like me, have to move their parent(s) out of a home they've lived in for a long time. In fact, there's a lot of great information for anyone who is getting ready to downsize and move for any reason, a lot of information on how to decide what to keep, how to find professionals to help with the processes, a lot of information on what steps to take and what order to take them in and all of it would make a great resource to have on hand. 

For me, for now at least, I'm not in the point in my life where this book is as helpful as it might be in another ten years (or, as I said, a couple of years ago). I'm not ready to become a minimalist nor to get rid of 90% of my photos. I have great respect for professionals who can offer valuable assistance in helping others (myself included) reduce the amount of stuff they have. But I sometimes feel like many of them push for a minimalist lifestyle that doesn't suit everyone. Still, there's a lot here that anyone can learn from, particularly those who are making a change in their lives. 

Happy Sunday! I hope it's as sunny there as it is here this morning - my day is always better when I can see the sun. I've had a very productive weekend; I took the day off Friday and have powered through getting a lot of decluttering done, laundry washed, and cleaning done. I'm feeling much lighter as I get rid of more and more things that don't need to live in my house any more, even if not all of it will show to the outside world. 

Last Week I: 

Listened To: I finished Shauna Niequist's Present Over Perfect and started Jenny Odell's Saving Time. I seem to be on a real nonfiction bend of late. 

Watched: We finished Daisy Jones and The Six and both agreed we might have liked it better if we hadn't read the book first or if they had stuck more closely to it. I've also watched some more of The Crown and last night we watched Bradley Cooper and Carey Mulligan in Maestro. I can see why they were both nominated for Academy Awards but it definitely wasn't what I was expecting in a movie about Leonard Bernstein. 

Read: I'm reading Mansfield Park for book club and Tommy Orange's Wandering Stars. I keep feeling like I'm still not reading as much as I once did, but when I logged in everything I'd read or listened to so far this year, I find that I've already finished twelve books. I'm just listening more than I'm sitting down with a book. 

Made: Homemade mac and cheese and chicken noodle soup. BG was out of town for a couple of nights and we've eaten out a couple of nights so not much cooking was going on here. 

Enjoyed: A visit from my uncle and BG and I went for a belated Valentine's Day dinner last night. We went to a place, Trini's, we've never been to before but that's been a staple in Omaha for more than forty years. It was so good - I'm really beating myself up that I've been missing it all of these years! 

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This Week I’m:  

Planning: The decluttering will continue. I'll finish what Go Simplified calls the entertaining areas. In her world, all of your entertaining things are in a couple of rooms, whereas my tablecloth collection is hanging in a guest room closet so, of course, while I was in that closet, I started going through everything in it. Need to finish that part of the project today so I don't have too many things started at once. 

Thinking About: My dad. He's not progressing as well as we had hoped and we may need to make some difficult decisions in the coming weeks. At the very least, I need to get some things in place sooner than I had planned. 

Feeling: More rested, thanks to that spur-of-the-moment decision to take Friday off. 

Looking forward to: Book club this week. 

Question of the week: I am so looking forward to my leftovers from last night's dinner, but I know a lot of people don't take home the food they don't finish. What about you - do you enjoy leftovers from dinners out? 

The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter by Margareta Magnusson

The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning: How to Free Yourself and Your Family from a Lifetime of Clutter by Margareta Magnusson

Published January 2018 by Scribner

128 pages

Publisher's Summary: 

In Sweden there is a kind of decluttering called döstädning, dö meaning “death” and städning meaning “cleaning.” This surprising and invigorating process of clearing out unnecessary belongings can be undertaken at any age or life stage but should be done sooner than later, before others have to do it for you. In The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning, artist Margareta Magnusson, with Scandinavian humor and wisdom, instructs readers to embrace minimalism. Her radical and joyous method for putting things in order helps families broach sensitive conversations, and makes the process uplifting rather than overwhelming. 

Margareta suggests which possessions you can easily get rid of (unworn clothes, unwanted presents, more plates than you’d ever use) and which you might want to keep (photographs, love letters, a few of your children’s art projects). Digging into her late husband’s tool shed, and her own secret drawer of vices, Margareta introduces an element of fun to a potentially daunting task. Along the way readers get a glimpse into her life in Sweden, and also become more comfortable with the idea of letting go.

My Thoughts:

You know how much I love to organize and how I'm always working to declutter my house (and still we're overwhelmed!). Any time I hear about a new idea to help with that process, I'm interested. But it wasn't until I heard someone talking about Swedish death cleaning on a podcast recently that I decided it was time to learn more. 

The concept it this: one day you will die and your loved ones will have to go through all of the things you have saved over the years and you can make their lives so much easier if you will take the time, particularly as you get older, to get rid of things that will have no real value to anyone else once you're gone. 

Not everything. Magnusson doesn't suggest that you get rid of everything you love or even live a minimalist life. She admits to being "somewhere between eighty and one hundred" and still keeps on a shelf a large stuffed animal of which she's quite fond. But, similarly to Marie Kondo, she recommends you go through things you don't use any more, take a moment to recall the memories they carry, and then get rid of them. Unlike some other methods, Magnusson's ideas about Swedish death cleaning recommend taking your time, advising that it may take years before you can go through everything. Even more reason to start now and not what until you're too old and it's even harder to part with things. 

Magnusson is big on shredding and tossing (some of the things she said she tossed seemed to me to be things she might have donated to a charity). She has also sold many of the things she got rid of, often without even asking her family if anyone might want the item. I'm sure that's meant to avoid any fighting amongst her family; but, having just cleaned out my parents' home, I know it can be done without fighting (I can't swear there were never any hard feelings or things people might have wanted that they didn't get). I also know that there were items that I was the only person who really wanted. Imagine if I had been looking forward to one day having the stewardship of that item, only to discover that my mom had sold it.

Magnusson has a sweet way about her and the book has a very personal feel. I can't say that there was a lot here that was new for me; but it was good reminder that we all have well more than we need and well more than I would ever want our children to have to deal with. I finished the book about a week ago and have already found that it has provided the encouragement I needed to let go of some things I might otherwise have held on to for emotional reasons, which is where I always struggle. For that I am grateful for this book.

Day of No Clutter!

Eve has a problem with clutter. Too much stuff and too easily acquired, it confronts her in every corner and on every surface in her house. When she pledges to tackle the worst offender, her horror of a "Hell Room," she anticipates finally being able to throw away all of the unnecessary things she can't bring herself to part with: her fifth-grade report card, dried-up art supplies, an old vinyl raincoat.

But what Eve discovers isn't just old CDs and outdated clothing, but a fierce desire within herself to hold on to her identity. Our things represent our memories, our history, a million tiny reference points in our lives. If we throw our stuff in the trash, where does that leave us? And if we don't...how do we know what's really important?

Everyone has their own Hell Room, and Eve's battle with her clutter, along with her eventual self-clarity, encourages everyone to dig into their past to declutter their future.

I requested Year of No Clutter a couple of months ago from Netgalley but have waited to read it until 40 Bags In 40 Days started because it's perfect timing, right?

I am the person most likely to declutter and purge in my house. But I am also the person responsible for most of the hoarding, too. I'm the keeper of everyone's identity, the person who can't let go of the tiny baby clothes, the kindergarten journals, the t-shirts from every team anyone has been part of, the baptism gifts. My closet is never overcrowded; my kitchen is cleaned out regularly to rid it of things I'm not using. But all of those memories? Those are my kryptonite. I can't wait to read this book and see if Schaub can help me let go of some of those things. After all, Mini-me not long ago told me he didn't really care about so many of the things that I had held onto ostensibly for him. If not for him, why am I still keeping them?

Year of No Clutter is available tomorrow, March 7 at all of your usual book outlets.

Sign up to receive a daily e-newsletter with tips, advice and videos from Eve Schaub on how to start conquering clutter this spring during the Week of No Clutter, March 7-14. Sign up now! Also, you can sign up to win a $100 gift card to The Container Store. You know I'm already signed up! http://books.sourcebooks.com/year-of-no-clutter/.